Therapy
I think there is still such a stigma attached to counselling and therapy and even the concept of self care.
Even now, taking care of your self by cutting out toxicity in your life is still viewed as being "selfish". There is absolutely nothing wrong and nothing selfish about putting your own mental health first, how are you able to be there for others and be a good friend/girlfriend/mother/sister etc when your mental health is deteriorating? Answer is, you cant.
Self care is not just about eating right and drinking lots of water, it's cutting out a person in your life that only has a negative influence on you, it's doing the things YOU want to do because you know those things will make you feel good. There is no harm in being a little "selfish" sometimes.
And as for therapy... When I was first diagnosed with anxiety i was given the number of a counsellor to call, now for someone with extreme anxiety, making phone calls to a complete stranger was absolutely terrifying to me. I knew it was something I needed to do yet I would make every excuse possible not to make that phone call, I would tell my self "Oh i'll just quickly finish reading this and then I'll call" or "nope I can't call today I'm not really in the mood to be talking to people" I would do everything I could to avoid making that phone call. And now I can't even fathom why it was so scary and alien to me.
Two years on and I still made no effort to go to therapy, I would constantly say to my self "Why do I need therapy? So I get anxious a lot, as if a qualified counsellor wants to hear me babble on about how many social situations I avoid? And how would talking even help? It's not like having a chat for an hour with a stranger is going to magically help my problems fade away?"
I was so wrong though, there is absolutely nothing wrong with therapy and when I eventually went it saved my life. I didn't go to therapy until my second suicide attempt when I was very nearly sectioned, once I was released from the hospital I was under the mental health crisis team.
Everyday they would come to my home and sit in my living room with me and just chat with me, they wouldn't just jump straight to it either they would sit there and ask me normal questions about my life and it made me feel so comfortable and at ease, it was like just sitting there and chatting to a friend which was a concept that had become alien to me as I had basically alienated my self from all of my friends and family.
The mental health team helped me get into the routine of speaking to strangers about my own feelings and issues and I started to enjoy it, I reached the stage where I literally had no other option but to seek help so I did. I faced my anxiety and made that phone call.
It was no where near as terrifying as I had originally thought, the person on the phone was so kind and helpful which instantly put me at ease. I had to answer a variety of questions about my mental state and before I knew it my appointment was booked and I was on my way to my first counselling session.
I remember walking to my appointment, my palms were so sweaty my pulse was going crazy, I was so nervous. But as soon as I walked in and met my therapist I instantly felt at ease, she was very welcoming and comforting to talk to, I never felt judged. I felt as though I could talk about anything and she would just listen, no judgement, no funny looks. Sometimes we would just talk, not even necessarily about my struggles but I guess everything we talked about would relate somehow to my issues. When I walked out of that building for the first time it was like a sigh of relief but I was eager to go back, I felt really good afterwards and as though a weight had been lifted.
I continued to see my therapist weekly for about five months, each session got easier and the conversation just flowed. It felt so natural, which I guess it is. Talking about your own feelings should feel natural, It shouldn't be something that we fear, we need to talk about our feelings in order for us to understand and learn about them.
Talking about my feelings, worries, my past and my future enabled me to understand them so much better and it helped me to deal with everything so much better, I begun to go back to that happy go lucky girl that I used to be.
I never used to take things to heart and whenever an issue in my life occurred I would always try to find a solution and would deal with it very well and I was starting to go back to that mind set. Seeing a therapist changed my life and helped make me realise that doing something as simple and as easy as talking to a stranger can really make a difference.
Even now, taking care of your self by cutting out toxicity in your life is still viewed as being "selfish". There is absolutely nothing wrong and nothing selfish about putting your own mental health first, how are you able to be there for others and be a good friend/girlfriend/mother/sister etc when your mental health is deteriorating? Answer is, you cant.
Self care is not just about eating right and drinking lots of water, it's cutting out a person in your life that only has a negative influence on you, it's doing the things YOU want to do because you know those things will make you feel good. There is no harm in being a little "selfish" sometimes.
And as for therapy... When I was first diagnosed with anxiety i was given the number of a counsellor to call, now for someone with extreme anxiety, making phone calls to a complete stranger was absolutely terrifying to me. I knew it was something I needed to do yet I would make every excuse possible not to make that phone call, I would tell my self "Oh i'll just quickly finish reading this and then I'll call" or "nope I can't call today I'm not really in the mood to be talking to people" I would do everything I could to avoid making that phone call. And now I can't even fathom why it was so scary and alien to me.
Two years on and I still made no effort to go to therapy, I would constantly say to my self "Why do I need therapy? So I get anxious a lot, as if a qualified counsellor wants to hear me babble on about how many social situations I avoid? And how would talking even help? It's not like having a chat for an hour with a stranger is going to magically help my problems fade away?"
I was so wrong though, there is absolutely nothing wrong with therapy and when I eventually went it saved my life. I didn't go to therapy until my second suicide attempt when I was very nearly sectioned, once I was released from the hospital I was under the mental health crisis team.
Everyday they would come to my home and sit in my living room with me and just chat with me, they wouldn't just jump straight to it either they would sit there and ask me normal questions about my life and it made me feel so comfortable and at ease, it was like just sitting there and chatting to a friend which was a concept that had become alien to me as I had basically alienated my self from all of my friends and family.
The mental health team helped me get into the routine of speaking to strangers about my own feelings and issues and I started to enjoy it, I reached the stage where I literally had no other option but to seek help so I did. I faced my anxiety and made that phone call.
It was no where near as terrifying as I had originally thought, the person on the phone was so kind and helpful which instantly put me at ease. I had to answer a variety of questions about my mental state and before I knew it my appointment was booked and I was on my way to my first counselling session.
I remember walking to my appointment, my palms were so sweaty my pulse was going crazy, I was so nervous. But as soon as I walked in and met my therapist I instantly felt at ease, she was very welcoming and comforting to talk to, I never felt judged. I felt as though I could talk about anything and she would just listen, no judgement, no funny looks. Sometimes we would just talk, not even necessarily about my struggles but I guess everything we talked about would relate somehow to my issues. When I walked out of that building for the first time it was like a sigh of relief but I was eager to go back, I felt really good afterwards and as though a weight had been lifted.
I continued to see my therapist weekly for about five months, each session got easier and the conversation just flowed. It felt so natural, which I guess it is. Talking about your own feelings should feel natural, It shouldn't be something that we fear, we need to talk about our feelings in order for us to understand and learn about them.
Talking about my feelings, worries, my past and my future enabled me to understand them so much better and it helped me to deal with everything so much better, I begun to go back to that happy go lucky girl that I used to be.
I never used to take things to heart and whenever an issue in my life occurred I would always try to find a solution and would deal with it very well and I was starting to go back to that mind set. Seeing a therapist changed my life and helped make me realise that doing something as simple and as easy as talking to a stranger can really make a difference.
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